Gabrielle *, 13, is the first to admit she loves having the best of everything. She lives in a big, beautiful house, thanks to her financially flush 'rents. Even though her closet is already bursting with designer clothes, this gorgeous spring day finds her toting her new Louis Cherry Blossom bag through a very upscale suburban shopping mall, on the hunt for even more swag.

It isn't long before her mom buys her some designer earrings, three new pairs of shoes and tons of makeup. When asked about the day's haul, Gabby just giggles, "I know I've been spoiled by my parents beyond belief." And she's planning more fun for the future: "I want to have a huge Sweet 16! Bigger than anything you've ever seen on MTV!" she exclaims. "I'll spend a million it, easy, and hire Usher, Mario, Christina Milian, Frankie J and Ashanti to sing!"

Gabrielle's love of livin' large isn't anything new, per se--just about any girl would dig a constant ride of shopping sprees and lavish parties. What is new in today's world is how many girls feel they have to maintain a big-bucks image--or risk feeling like a total reject.

RICH GIRLS

It's all over the place: Gwen Stefani singing, "If I were a rich girl" ... the Gossip Girl novels, which make you so want to live just one day in Blair's or Serena's Manolo Blahniks ... TV shows such as Gastineau Girls and My Super Sweet 16 that celebrate the joy of being as rude as you want--just as long as you have the cold, hard cash to back it up.

Even walking down the halls at school can make a girl feel the heat. Just a few years ago, only a handful of high-school fashionistas knew who Marc Jacobs is. Now many teen fashion magazines blatantly instruct you to covet one of his $500-plus bags.

In 2003/2004, teens ages 13 to 17 spent 11 percent more on luxury items (like clothes, makeup and electronics) than in the previous year. Kids spend an average $170 billion dollars total per year--that's around $3,309 per person at a rate of about $92 a week. It's no coincidence that even upscale brands like Tiffany, Burberry and Ralph Lauren now target teens with special ads and merchandise--and are raking in over $12 billion a year.

The Glamorous Life

As with most trends, the conspicuous consumption started with celebrities. Rhonda Borman, social worker and child lecturer in Tennessee, surveyed a group of girls ages 10 to 15 about the stars they admire. Their top choices: Hilary Duff and Hilary Swank. Initially, what kind of clothes or how much cash the Hilarys had played no role in picking favorites. "The younger girls were mostly not conscious of the impact," says Borman. Interestingly, though, "when I pointed it out," she says, "the girls said they felt jealous many celebrities could get whatever they want!"

TV and magazines treat us to a steady media diet of teen celebs showing off shoes that cost hundreds and outfits that cost thousands. That said, you can't fault Lindsay, Hilary, or Mary-Kate and Ashley for working hard and spending their money how they please.

But then there are the non-working girls who spend their parents' money like there's no tomorrow. Flip on MTV's ultimate spoiled brat-a-thon My Super Sweet 16. Last season featured Natalie, a girl whose sole ambition was to throw a party that would make people burn with jealousy. And let's not forget Ava, who actually auditioned boys for the honor of carrying her into her party (only super-hotties need apply).

My Super Sweet 16 draws mega-strong reactions. "I love that show!" laughs Gabrielle. "It's so cool to see what they spend their money on. The girls on that show are spoiled but cool--it's great to go to a store, try on anything and buy everything you like!"

But we spoke to other girls from backgrounds similar to Gabby's who had the opposite reaction. Lauren, 14, is horrified. "I think the girls on My Super Sweet 16 are really mean," she says. "I'm happy that my parents would never spend $500,000 on a party for me. I want a Sweet 16 with just a couple of friends who really matter to me, and I wouldn't care if I didn't get any gifts!"

The scary message these reality shows can give, though, is that money equals power and that having power means you can do anything you want-no matter how it affects others.

The Price of Friendship

Nicole, 16, reached her limit a few months ago. "I just hate money," she says, exasperated. Though she's probably not the first girl to make that remark, the fact that Nicole says it while sitting in her luxurious bedroom, steps away from her overstocked closet and marble bathroom, makes her take somewhat more unique. Like her friends, she attends a pricey private school, just got a brand-new car for her birthday and is never lacking for funds.

But she sees her wealth as a dividing line between her and some other girls. To her progressive school's credit, her small junior class is a combination of well-to-do daughters and scholarship students from less privileged homes.

"I don't ever throw the fact that I have money in people's faces," says Nicole. "That's just gross. I hate those girls on TV--they make me sick. But sometimes I'll be out for Chinese with friends, and everyone assumes I should pay because my parents have the most money. Or they'll tell me to get the movie tickets while they park the car.

"It's not a big deal, I guess, but sometimes I get mad. I don't think they're using me--I just think they see it as my job to pay for things because I can. I never complain, though, but I do think it's a problem in our friendship. The thing is, no one ever talks about it. It's like money is taboo. And I'd be really bummed to lose them over it."

Nicole's classmate Katherine, 15, is not poor by any stretch of the imagination but not super-rich either. From her perspective, "At our school, money can totally determine how high you'll climb on the status beanstalk. Can't afford those Rogan jeans? You'll never hang with the cool girls. Girls like Nicole aren't nasty about it--it's much more subtle. But if you can't afford to shop where they shop, take the trips they do and go out every minute ... what is there really to do with them? What do you have in common? Nothing."

The ATM Fam

More and more parents feel like they must cave so their daughters will have the goods to be popular. Kaitlyn, 17, claims her parents just want her to be happy ... and she has the gold card to prove it. "My parents--I dunno how to explain it. Ever since I was younger and saw something I wanted--and nothing crazy, mind you--they always wanted me to have it. They both work really hard, and I think this is their way of thanking me for being a good kid. I get good grades, I don't party out of control, and I do what they want me to do."

So what does Kaitlyn get in return? "I put whatever I want on my mother's credit card. She gave me an American Express card that's tied in to hers. Honestly, I don't think she even notices what I spend. We shop at the same stores, so I think she assumes most of the charges are hers. I feel bad that some of my friends have to worry about money so much because I just ... don't."

But parents like Kaitlyn's, who constantly shower their kids with expensive shoes and clothes aren't really doing them any favors. They aren't teaching them how to be realistic or smart about the value of money. Many rich girls don't have a clue about what it's really like to hold down a job or manage a budget, figuring their 'rents will always be there to pick up the tab.

It usually takes hard work to afford a luxurious lifestyle. Worst-case scenario, some wealthy girls might not even think about a future career because no one is making them lift a French-manicured finger for themselves. "The girls I surveyed about privileged celebrities did realize that whatever any celebrity is known for, that's their job and how they earn their wealth," says Borman. "Girls should learn to make decisions about their future work choices by finding their positive abilities and using them."

What does that mean for the teen-girl population? Focus less on buying up every color of Converse All Stars in the rainbow, and more on your talents and interests--which are way more valuable in the long run.

True Riches

Statistics show most kids still shop at JCPenney and Wal-Mart, not Neiman Marcus or Saks Fifth Avenue. Truth is, whether your T-shirt is by Hanes or Juicy Couture, it makes you no better or worse than anybody else.

"I get nice stuff from my parents, but then I have to work for things I want, too," Gabrielle says. "I say to rich bratty kids, lose that drama! You're never gonna feel totally good about yourself if you just take and never give."